Turbulence

I'm feeling a lot right now. Angry, overwhelmed, sad - those are the main feelings. I want to scream, cry, cut, throw things, break things!

I don't know if I want to be 34! All 34 means is that for 18 years no one has helped me. That's all it means. That I've just suffered another year of torment. It really is just proof that nothing has worked for me and nothing will.

I'm not even halfway through my life! I can't go through the rest of my life this way. They say you can do anything. After all, what other choice do you have? There is always another choice.

How can I possibly have gone from 16 to 34 and NOT gotten any better?? Not only haven't I gotten better, I've actually gotten worse! It doesn't make sense!

Right now any little thing is too much. I don't feel like I can handle anything. I hate this!