Balance between episodes

a - 3
d - 3
e - 5

Sorry I haven't posted in quite a while. I just haven't felt a need to lately.

I'm sure you noticed something new at the top of this post (a is for anxiety, d is for depression, and e is for emotional dysregulation). The scores are a great barometer for how I'm doing week to week. In a few paragraphs I'll tell you about them in more detail. I rate myself every Wednesday and I've decided to include them in my blog. So from now on, every time I have new scores I'll include them.

I'm doing quite well. For the past month or so I've leveled out and been in this wonderful place of balance. I keep marveling at this feeling of calm. Is this what life would be like for me if I didn't have bipolar? I think probably so.

I'm sleeping well and able to cope with the things life is currently throwing at me. Things still bug me, but I don't let them get to me. I have energy and motivation, but not to the extreme.

I'm still seeing my shrink and therapist. There's a scale for them that I rate myself every week for anxiety, depression, and emotional dysregulation. It ranges from 0-100 (100 being the worst). From April to about a month ago I scored high weekly without fail. For the last month, however, I've been scoring between 3-31. The difference in me is like night and day.

I love this time between episodes. I am, however, a realist. I know that I will have another episode... probably within the next few months if things follow their normal course. So I will treasure the balance for as long as it lasts.